In everyday you have a series of moments that come and go, you have the decision to let it fly by without notice. You also have a choice to kill it, own it, breath it in and make it a memory. Not many people take that chance and then it’s gone, you can’t get it back, it’s like trying to catch a rock you’ve already hurled into the lake.
I’m not saying this to sound deep (have you read my last posts?) I’m saying this because even when I’m busy with work, paid work, I always say yes to things that will make me happy and moments that I will make the most of.
Yesterday I went and did a shoot with Jane & Jane my favourite twins in the whole world. It was last minute but from what I learned sometimes those are the best. I got to work with an amazing make up artist Shawna Downing who I had only heard wonderful things about through the grape vine. The studio was a loft space off of Carlaw that overlooked the street, it had high ceilings, wood floors, and lots of natural light, needless to say it sparked every creative bone in my body.
I can’t wait to see the finals when they are ready, the model Meeshi rocked it, she had so much energy and little inhibitions holding her back. I was reminded of The Paris brand Celine, very clean and contemporary with a touch of seventies influence. My personal style is vintage contemporary and so this shoot was like being released in a playground where all the toys are mine to play with.
On a more personal note, apparently I am an intimidating person, I’ve had two of my best friends chime in with this after a long discussion about why I seem to be doing the chasing in social situations. I don’t know whether its because I’m loud and outgoing, I clean up well, or people associate doing stuff you like really cool…but I don’t bite. I don’t think I’m intimidating, I’m usually a very socially embracing person who genuinely gives a shit about people I meet. I guess this blog can kind of work against me sometimes, it’s hard meeting people who already have a preconceived idea of who you are. That’s when you look at your “online” persona opposed to your real life one, but to be honest guys I’m not much different. I talk about embarrassing myself on the daily and ill even go as far as making a list of the things that make me human, make me a hot mess of a lady, and make you see that sometimes I don’t have it all together just like every other mid twenty year old.
1. When I get excited my voice doubles in volume regardless if I’m on a streetcar on my phone, a small table in a restaurant, or in my living room while my mum is trying to watch TV.
2. I’ve spent the last three months sleeping on a couch…enough said about that.
3. I never know when to stop talking, it’s a nervous habit and when I feel like silence could creep in I start up on something else, especially with strangers.
4. My laugh is NOT sexy, it’s booming and sometimes I make weird snorting sounds or these back of the throat noises that sound like I’m trying to speak Dutch…I don’t know Dutch.
5. I genuinely think smoking looks cool
6. I move my hands A LOT when I tell a story, like an Italian on coke
7. I constantly think I have a camel toe
8. More then 2 times a week I try on nine to ten different outfits before I leave the house only to come back in a couple hours and change again.
9. I barely brush my hair
10. I over think the smallest decisions, like going down to the store, taking one street opposed to another, do I want tomato or cheese or both?
11. I have panic attacks every time I post a blog because who knows someone might hate what I’m doing and deep down I care.
That last one was hard to write because of how true it is, I may seem like a pretty confident person, I am in some ways and I’m not in others. Whenever someone intimidates me I usually think of them taking a huge shit, like the kind that make your face red and smell terrible. Everybody is human and nobody is better then anyone, some people are this way, others are that.
So next time you think someone is way out of your league, you think they are too cool to talk to, picture them taking a shit and remember that deep down they are fighting their own battles just like you.
– Casey Jane