…And we’re back!

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Guys I’ve never felt so alive in my entire life!
Oh and hi…how are you? It’s been awhile…two weeks too long I’ve been running around this city, this country, and America! I’ll try my best to recap all the events and work that has happened over the last little while so bare with me because this post maybe a long one so ill try and keep it interesting.
First up, I did wardrobe for Taylor Swift when she was in Toronto and I have to say even though I’m not a fan of her music that lady is a sweetheart! I dressed her dancers during the show while organizing racks of costumes with some really fun people.
My boss Marie-Eve was off on a much needed vacation and left me in charge of a four commercial spot which was daunting and exciting at the same time. I learned so much from everyone around me and being on set was extremely rewarding…I still don’t understand how I get paid for having so much fun, it’s hard hard work, emotionally and physically, but it feeds my soul. I know that this is what I was meant to do, I get goosebumps more and more.
Last Thursday I woke up at 3am because I couldn’t sleep at all, sometimes the realization that I’m still on my mums couch is frustrating and it keeps me up thinking. Sometimes I cry…a lot but I know it’s just a matter of time before everything changes for the better again. Ill be able to have my dog more then just a night, ill be able to stretch my legs out, and ill have known that I did it and I never gave up on myself.
Anyway so last Thursday I went to the commercial shoot for our 6am call time and dressed some lovely actors in the wardrobe Marie Eve and I worked so hard to put together, it was amazing seeing it all come together on film. I worked until noon until my phone chimed that three of my best girlfriends were awaiting in a SUV to whisk me off to the states for a 4 day road trip to a music festival in Dover, Delaware…yup Delaware.
We crossed the boarder no problem and thought we were doing great until the inevitable happened…bitches got lost. After checking three different kinds of maps we finally got back on the road and headed across Pensilvania, there was a lot of laughing until we realized how far behind we were. We ended up at a Target in Scranton and bought bikini tops and other useless items that our tired brains thought were necessary. We spent about 30 minutes sitting in a parking lot drinking red bull and farting…then back in the car to deal with a caffeine overdose and the realization that we were only going to sleep for 2 hours once we reached our hotel just outside the festival.
But wait more was in store for us, once we got to the hotel after driving for 12 hours my friend Shaina realized that the hotel room was accidentally booked three days ahead of the date we needed it. After scaring the shit out of the front desk man and having a short mental break down we decided that drinking the only bottle of wine we had in the car at 4am was the best option. We then drove to a near by diner and ate grilled cheese until it was time to get our car in line for our festival camp site. Shaina now not giving any fucks cut in front of a bunch of cars and we ended up being 10th in line.
We got our two campsites side by side and started to set up what we called Shanty Town, it was hilarious. Our canopy was built with safety pins and duck tape, decorated with shitty streamers and solar lights that barely worked. The tent was just a giant room with two air mattresses that we periodically would pass out in until the sun got too hot to handle.
I want to now describe each one of our “moments” on this trip, I mean the music was amazing, the bands were incredible, we met the nicest people, Jesse and Johnny Walker ( you two made our last night so wonderful and fun) but what really made this trip was the four of us trying to navigate our hangovers and events during the days and nights.
Shaina’s moment was when we were leaving on the last day, she was covered in face paint and still wasted. Our car had no gas and no power which thankfully was brought back to life by some guys Shaina had met while streaking around the camp grounds, she usually brought all the boys to our yard. She also mangled her body a number of times, one being pulling her shoulder out trying to help me put the canopy up.
Meghan’s moment was again on the last day when she couldn’t figure out how to open the gas canister. It was 36 degrees out and she had to manage all the craziness because let’s face it, the rest of us were pathetically useless. I think at one point she walked away for a breather until catching the horrible smell from the porter potties down the road.
Kate…well Kate had a bunch of moments but the best was one morning when we went and got breakfast sandwiches and headed back to the campsite. We were all sitting around eating and laughing when all of a sudden a piece of sandwich she was trying to put in her mouth just ejected from between her lips. Then she (for some reason) thought about how badly she had to poop and made herself gag that was followed by a burp. Then she tried to drink some PediaLite to try and calm the hangover which made her eject that all over the side of our camp blanket. And I will never forget the look on my dearest friends face after these events, dripping with liquid in crooked sunglasses and smelling like a bag of dicks, naturally I grabbed my disposable camera and snapped the moment. Oh and on the last day I slammed the car door on her arm and I seriously thought she was going to punch me in the throat…I’ve never in the 12 years I’ve known her seen her that angry, luckily we all know how to let things go and make the best of it even if it seems impossible.
My moment…well it wasn’t dramatic by any means, it was when we found out we were not sleeping in a comfy hotel bed. I had been up for 28 hours at this point and was about to spontaneously combust with tiredness. I got really really quiet, everyone else got in the car and I stayed outside, lit a smoke and leaned on the back tire of the SUV to think. I thought I had lost my mind, I got up took a big breath and notice that the trailer beside us had a case of bottled water taped down. I ripped the bag open grabbed a bottle and marched over to a BMW and drew a massive cock on their back window. For some reason that made me feel better, I got back in the car and was met by Meghan wearing jewelled sunglasses brandishing a bottle of red wine.
That was Firefly…in a nutshell.
Yesterday I was straight back to work on a film called The Double Date where I met more amazing people and got to create a really great story. I pushed myself through the day and made sure I was as professional as I could be to make the film, the clothing shine through the characters. My friend Thomas Dagg was the DP and brought me on, it was a fantastic crew and I made a lot of new contacts and friends. This is again why I love my work, it’s filled with amazing creative people who work just as hard to do what they want to do.

So there you have it folks, the short story for sure but honestly the last two weeks have blown my mind. The main reason is because of all the AMAZING people I have met, worked with, bonded with, created with, and laughed with. I always admire people who are selfless, kind, generous, creative and wear their heart and soul on their sleeves. Those are the people that I keep in my life and I have no time or effort to chase down or spend emotion on people that are selfish, competitive, flakey, mean, and don’t take people’s hearts seriously. The people that are meant to be in your life will easily fall into it, the people that aren’t will feel like a constant struggle and effort, so let those people go, as hard as it is, it’s not worth pulling out with heart strings for.

I’m so happy I’m back to blogging, I missed it and I missed sharing with all you beautiful amazing people that read it.

Happy happy Wednesday Loves!!!

– Casey Jane

Tunes for this post

Ellie Goulding – Anything Could Happen
The Lumineers – Ho Hey
Anthony De Costa – Across the Country
Haim – Forever
Selah Sue – Raggamuffin

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Self Management: The Art of Kicking Your Own Ass

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Every now and then life starts giving you little hints, or big ones that a little self management is in order. You can either ignore it and wait for the shit storm to happen, or you can be aware of the hints and take a step back to reorganizing your life’s constant to-do list. I’ve gotten a lot better at being aware of these “hints” because for me they happen pretty quickly when I’m slacking a bit. I know the consequences of ignorance, I’ve learned the hard way a bunch of times and now that I don’t have a “normal” day job its even more crucial that I continue to motivate myself…even if its raining, I have cramps that feel like a loose wombat is in my uterus, it’s 25 degrees and all my friends are off to the island, and the list goes on.
There will always be something else you could be doing, but letting that ” Im missing out” feeling take hold is not the right answer. I mean if you have a day off, which everyone should, then yea go balls to the wall with excitement and adventure. I’m talking about the days where you know you have to do a lot, it’s racing in your mind, but tomorrow you could get it done right?
Your shooting yourself in the foot.
Being alive is work, I know that sounds hilarious but think of it this way, you can either exist in everyday just filling up the hours with distractions until the weekend where you fill it with more distractions. You can spend hours on Facebook, party every night, hangout with friends, smoke cigarettes, stare at the wall, and watch hours of Netflix.
OR
You can make a list of all the things that you want to do for yourself, things that will move your life forward, things that create the feeling of living. Read something that makes your think, learn a skill that you never knew before, look into that job you never thought you could have, exercise, and go explore places you never make time to explore.
Now as far as work goes because I never have the same day as the next I usually make a “Casey’s Work List” where I write out all the must do’s for the day. A lot of stuff in my work is time sensitive so I make sure that I put the most important stuff at the top or at the beginning of the week. Once I have all my work scheduled I then fill in the gaps of time for me stuff. There are some days where I don’t get the list done, there are some days where I do something completely different but I have that list that follows me and gets me back on track.
Last week was scattered, I let my social life take over a bit, it’s okay but you begin to realize that if your always available to hangout then your the one who isn’t doing anything for themselves. I did have a shoot and did a lot of shopping for the commercial I’m working on however the nights were filled with drinking wine and going out. Sunday morning I crashed and realized how cluttered my brain was with guilt, negativity, and anger towards myself. That was my hint and Im a much happier person when Im focused and sober, my creativity is more organized and the drive to kick ass comes back.

Give yourself a break but listen to your actions, they are yours and only yours to live with. Let go of things that hold you back and work hard at making your life awesome, cause who doesn’t love being awesome?
I recently watched this documentary on an artist named Wayne White called Beauty is Embarrassing. In it he explains that you’ve only got about 60 good years on this planet, that’s it, so fuck it, why wouldn’t you do what you love? And let me say that doing what you love can be taken a bunch of different ways, but to be successful at living you have to put passion into it, it has to create that ideal life you’ve always wanted. That’s the key is make the life you’ve always wanted because darlin you don’t have that much time on this Earth.

Alright that’s enough ranting and self justification for me, I think sometimes I write these posts for myself to read more then others…

Happy Monday Lovelies

– Casey Jane

Killing the Moment

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In everyday you have a series of moments that come and go, you have the decision to let it fly by without notice. You also have a choice to kill it, own it, breath it in and make it a memory. Not many people take that chance and then it’s gone, you can’t get it back, it’s like trying to catch a rock you’ve already hurled into the lake.
I’m not saying this to sound deep (have you read my last posts?) I’m saying this because even when I’m busy with work, paid work, I always say yes to things that will make me happy and moments that I will make the most of.
Yesterday I went and did a shoot with Jane & Jane my favourite twins in the whole world. It was last minute but from what I learned sometimes those are the best. I got to work with an amazing make up artist Shawna Downing who I had only heard wonderful things about through the grape vine. The studio was a loft space off of Carlaw that overlooked the street, it had high ceilings, wood floors, and lots of natural light, needless to say it sparked every creative bone in my body.
I can’t wait to see the finals when they are ready, the model Meeshi rocked it, she had so much energy and little inhibitions holding her back. I was reminded of The Paris brand Celine, very clean and contemporary with a touch of seventies influence. My personal style is vintage contemporary and so this shoot was like being released in a playground where all the toys are mine to play with.

On a more personal note, apparently I am an intimidating person, I’ve had two of my best friends chime in with this after a long discussion about why I seem to be doing the chasing in social situations. I don’t know whether its because I’m loud and outgoing, I clean up well, or people associate doing stuff you like really cool…but I don’t bite. I don’t think I’m intimidating, I’m usually a very socially embracing person who genuinely gives a shit about people I meet. I guess this blog can kind of work against me sometimes, it’s hard meeting people who already have a preconceived idea of who you are. That’s when you look at your “online” persona opposed to your real life one, but to be honest guys I’m not much different. I talk about embarrassing myself on the daily and ill even go as far as making a list of the things that make me human, make me a hot mess of a lady, and make you see that sometimes I don’t have it all together just like every other mid twenty year old.

1. When I get excited my voice doubles in volume regardless if I’m on a streetcar on my phone, a small table in a restaurant, or in my living room while my mum is trying to watch TV.
2. I’ve spent the last three months sleeping on a couch…enough said about that.
3. I never know when to stop talking, it’s a nervous habit and when I feel like silence could creep in I start up on something else, especially with strangers.
4. My laugh is NOT sexy, it’s booming and sometimes I make weird snorting sounds or these back of the throat noises that sound like I’m trying to speak Dutch…I don’t know Dutch.
5. I genuinely think smoking looks cool
6. I move my hands A LOT when I tell a story, like an Italian on coke
7. I constantly think I have a camel toe
8. More then 2 times a week I try on nine to ten different outfits before I leave the house only to come back in a couple hours and change again.
9. I barely brush my hair
10. I over think the smallest decisions, like going down to the store, taking one street opposed to another, do I want tomato or cheese or both?
11. I have panic attacks every time I post a blog because who knows someone might hate what I’m doing and deep down I care.

That last one was hard to write because of how true it is, I may seem like a pretty confident person, I am in some ways and I’m not in others. Whenever someone intimidates me I usually think of them taking a huge shit, like the kind that make your face red and smell terrible. Everybody is human and nobody is better then anyone, some people are this way, others are that.
So next time you think someone is way out of your league, you think they are too cool to talk to, picture them taking a shit and remember that deep down they are fighting their own battles just like you.

Tunes
Sarah Jaffe – Shut it Down
Robert Ellis – Cemetery
Tennis – Marathon
The Milk Carton Kids – Michigan
Chet Faker – Love and Feeling

Later Loves
– Casey Jane

Tell Me What?

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If you had told me what my life would be like and is currently 12 months ago I would have slapped you, backhanded…and then I’d laugh in your face and call you an idiot. But here we are, or rather, here I am roaming around trying to pick up the pieces of myself I’ve forgotten. I feel like those can collecting Chinese ladies in Bellwoods Park, but before I can cash in I’ve misplaced them again.
This weekend was hilarious, anything with my group of friends usually is as we are all, in our own right, ridiculous. I know you all can relate to your own group of friends. They are chaotic beauty, the ones where you have no boundaries in conversation, and the ones that make your life seem like a movie…or an episode of GIRLS.
Saturday night as I looked at my best friend as she kicked a dirty mattress yelling fuck you in an alley way, I realized I loved life. When I woke up Sunday to find 8 missed calls from my companions I felt a warm hug around me, or maybe it was the hangover.
This week is busy, last week was busy, and I’m happy about it. Having each day never line up with the next is a shit-tsunami but it’s exciting. People wonder what I do all day and it’s an interesting question. I do lots of things, I pick my nose, I write this blog, I go to meetings, I attempt to be cool over text messaging, I jay walk…a lot, I walk my dog, I shop for photo shoots, I eat food…any variety, and then I collapse on my couch bed into a half baked state until the next day.
That’s my life and that’s the way it’s going to be from now on.
The photos above are snap shots of last week. My friend Shaina falling off a bench in a park, she sparked a new styling series called “drunk girls”. Kate and Evely kicking down mattresses and garbage in the ally way next to 751 bar. Me being hungover. The Gladstone hotel…that’s all I’m saying about that. A balloon outside my work on Monday morning saying P.S I Love You, I decided is was for me and not for a 12 year old on her birthday from her granny.

Anyway ill report back later in the week, I’m currently working on 4 commercials while my boss is on vacation in Istanbul…needless to say I’m shitting my pants a bit.

Tunes!!!
Lil Dicky – Stayin In

Angus and Julia Stone – Mango Tree

Night Beds – Borrowed Time

Happy Tuesday loves

– Casey Jane